The point of having my alarm NOT next to my bed is so that when I wake up, I actually get UP to turn off the awful noise. I do that. But then I also go back to bed. And, I usually pull the covers over my head because really, who wants to go to work on Saturday in time for a 7:30 call!!?? NO ONE!!!
I'm saving one of the supervisors of this terribleness and told her not to come in and I'd handle her team today. Not that that is a serious thing - Of her 12 person team, only 2 work today. It's like babysitting, and then putting the kids to bed. Just sitting there, doing nothing (maybe watching TV, or in my case, on the internet) waiting for someone to come here and tell me to go home!!
One of the people I am "babysitting" likes my scarf and I think she also hates her life right now and would rather be in bed. The other one has a cow as her background on her computer. This is definitely weird. But not as weird as when I thought it was a giant pig. She has a lisp. And she has also lost 30 lbs and looks forward to dressing like me when she loses more pounds. This is pretty much an identical picture to what she has on her desktop right now:
And, cow lady keeps talking to me. I think I might move back into my hole of a conference room....
Before I go though, it's come to my attention that I need to be more clear about the statement "Thanks to Miss Claire (one of the few people who still looks great even with chocolate sauce all over her face!) for joining us!!!". It was brought to my attention that I actually have two friends this would fit.
This is follower 53:
This could, and should be, follower 54:
Wow, so I thought I would just come online and do a quick update, but I remembered something (THANK YOU JARROD) that I have been meaning to discuss with all of you!! FACEBOOK! I was in a mood a few weeks, months, days whatever ago. And I started defriending people. I mean - do I really need to be friends with sophmore year RA who did not write us up? No. Do I think she'll ever care that I defriended her? No. She was one person to the roommates, but to her we were lots of people and hard to keep track of. But, I was doing some facestalking a few days, weeks, months ago whatever and one thing led to another and I was clicking on a profile of someone I know I was friends with (and, actually, I know HE friended ME) and.. well... I WAS DEFRIENDED!!!!!! Have you ever discovered that you were defriended??? Was it such a mixed bag of emotions that you didn't know to laugh or cry!?? Because - that is what it was for me.
This kid, Roommate Alex, was roommates with Jarrod in New Orleans. And during a most fabulous visit (really, so fabulous, I should blog about it even though it is way before the time of abitcattywampus) we went got drive through daquaris and went to the Fly and just played games and chatted and Roommate Alex BLACKED OUT (which other people were blacked out too, cough, Cone) - anyway, the only thing Roommate Alex said the ENTIRE TIME was "IDIOT!". That was the only word I remember him saying. I don't think he ever said a complete thought or sentence that did not involve him shouting and slurring the word "Idiot!". And, as far as facestalking goes, he doesn't really bring anything to the table, but, sometimes, you just end up on a profile and like to see what was going on and that jerk defriended ME. Like I am not worthy of his friendship. He, ironicially, IS a total IDIOT! (And he likes yogurt.)
Uh, that trip to New Orleans was SO.MUCH.FUN! It was me, Cone (who flew to Chattanooga and drove down with me), McCowan and Kernion. McCowan and Kernion had just broken up so she, for reasons I'm still not certain of but assume had something to do with anger, bit him. Like - seriously bit him and broke skin and left weird teeth marks on his arm. We also stole a pen and woke up with notes all over our arms and neck about god only knows what after a night of drinking. The next day was the Fly, and you know about that, but you don't know about Bobby
And, upon reviewing emails, I want to share two with all of you, that might really only be funny to the few of us who wrote them or got them, but, in the hopes that you might laugh as hard as I did upon finding them...
We got home late one night and for whatever reason REALLY wanted to email the Walker serv, with McCowan's email. Everyone was so tired ready to pass out, but just before McCowan passed out we convinced him to give us his email password and some words of wisdowm. They were:
dear matthew sterling,
sometimes you are so handsome. sometimes you send emails that cause problems. on the third time you are jewish. but all of the time we think of you. in our thoughts we reflect upon our times we shared. also in our thoughts you're naked- but also some of the time you are wearing a onezies. but enough about lee, g-lo: where are you? tell us the l'amb girls you made out with.. krenibahl your mom says hi. google there's no fee unless we get money for you.
lets get to the meat of things. why are we all here? what is our existence on this planet? whenever i imagine my elightenment i see white. i see purity. i see walkers. and with that purity i see calm. i strive to reach that calmness. in times of black (out) i see this especially. it is you who continusly demands our constant intercession. what i want is just to be given to. to take. it is the circle of life to give and to take.
btw grim shat his pants in new orleans today.
so i have one question for you all: if you would ask god one question, what would you ask him? or her? or it?
do kangaroos punches really hurt?
and also where can i find diagon ally?
yellow.
boiled potatos.
love,
xoxo gossip BULL
Oh my gosh - I hope Jarrod is shirtless reading this and laughing so hard rignt now!!! The final recap was sent to the Circle at the end of the visit. The highlights were:
This is the in the moment Circle recap: ladies.... typing to you right now from new orleans (also a paradise) i'm listening to the obnoxious snore of conor's as we all are dealing with a hang over right now. we had amazing (!!!!!!!!!!!) day drinking today on the mississippi (sip for short) river- all the tulane kids go there and its base the hub lawn but more people and actual water and amazing. there are NO LAWS in new orleans. at least no one to enforce them. ser, beverages everywhere. IN THE CAR. walking into the gas station. at the sip. there are dogs in bars too. and last night we were mini-pyros, lighting everything on fire. seriously, i'm right now enjoying my first diet coke and only because i think it will help my hangover? i d k! anyway, we had the great day drinking and conor gets blacked out (i actually know exactly which sip of beer sent him over the edge) so we are driving home and he is slowly passing out and then the next thing i know he is barfing out the window. everyone in the car thinks this is funny and jarrod does a u turn and slams on his breaks and poor cone still has his head out the window puking. my $5 sunglasses were ruined-- i just bought them this morning at a market. puke is everywhere. jarrod gets out of the car to assess the damage and then tells us he pooped his pants! seriously, POOP. AND during a photo op matt mccowan pulled kernions earring out of her ear- blood was involved. i can't
even believe all of these events that occurred in such short time frame. oh, and last night mccowan tripped on a parking space thing (you know what i'm talking about right?) and i've never seen a wipeout like it... he managed to save half his marg! (they have plastic cups by the doors in case you don't finish your drink and have to leave... its amazing) i hope you girls are laughing at any of this, because even as i type it i'm cracking up.
How badly does this make you want to go on a trip with your BFFs? As non-follower but potential follower 54, Clare, said "to be fair we had more fun in 4 years than a lot of people get in thier whole lives". I want more fun!!
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