Farewell 2011!

Good Day and Welcome to the last blog post of 2011.

I had a terrible thought today, and that thought was: what if this isn't the last blog post of 2011, but the last blog post of abitcattywampus? Silly, I know, but I feel an unnecessary amount of (self) pressure to up my blogging skills, content and occurences. You know, I do listen to what you followers say in casual conversation and you're all a very difficult group to please. If I'm telling wild tales of raging some of you say "Uh, Megan, too long of a post" or "Uh, Megan, we like it better when you complain" or some say "I didn't laugh at that" (cough, Jarrod).  I also am worried that the only person that really reads my blog is my Dad. And, while my Dad is a great follower, he kind of has to read if he's a follower. I mean, I am the oldest and best child. It only makes sense!

What am I getting at here? I think I need to revamp the blog in 2012 if it's going to survive.  I need to be more dedicated to posting. And, I need to think what I'm going to post about. And I need to find 100 followers! And that's what I'm FEELING and I'm not sure what I'm going to do about it.

I'll decide at 12:04AM 1/1/2012.

But, since all of that is happening in 2012, here's what I've been busy doing these last few weeks of 2011:

Most immediately, I have a run in my hoe. And what does that mean, exactly? In college, the roommates and I took to some particular speaking habits. We can speak for hours in what will sound like entirely incomplete thoughts in a different language, but we all know what is going on. One of the peculiar things (or so others have told me) was our ability to singuar-ize (new word) things that are usually plural for the singluar. So, like... Pants : Pant. Shoes: Shoe. Hose: Hoe. These may seem like minor changes, but it's enough for an outside listener to think: What? A sentence could be: I couldn't find a pant I liked that matched my shirt. I need a shoe to wear tonight (even though we would definitely be wearing two shoes). Or, I have a run in my hoe (abbreve for hose, abbreve for pantyhose/nylon/tights). This run in my hoe is just about trying to ruin my day. These are BRAND NEW! They were an average of $4, but they are nude and see through but still thick with a very subtle pattern. Perfect for spicing up a work outfit without being out of control. And my new boot has this great zipper on it and just SNAGGED it like SNAGGING is it's job! Which, it is NOT because WALKING is there job. This all happened before 9AM on a great outfit day. Happy Thursday. God.

Transitioning: I did not wear pantyhose when I was home for the holidays. I spent much of my time in sweats, jeans and leggings. I didn't even really pack a work outfit which was terrible because I went into the office and had to dress business casual. I love going into the Pittsburgh office because I have met some wonderful people in that office through my last role. I don't really go in to the office to work - I go in to the office to go to lunch with the ladies. We went to Max and Irma's and I had the chicken tortilla soup and it was fabulous!

Baby Rain also came to visit for the weekend. I cannot say ENOUGH how cute he is! He can work the iPad and iPhone and with a little bit of help has beaten a level of Angry Birds (I'm not bragging or anything.) He also loves remotes and the on/off button on the TV. I, however, really like the Weeble toy we got him that has a crank to get the Weebles to the top of the slide and then they hit a noise maker at the end of the slide and this really great Weebles Wobble But The Don't Fall Down Music plays. Most grown ups play with that toy longer than Baby Rain does.

Miller Family Christmas happens the week before Christmas for as long as I can remember. This was the third annual Cousin's Night Out, celebrated on the Southside and everyone that could be in attendance was! We milked a few uncles for some cash money and my Dad also attended and purchased the first round! We had a lot of fun and were pretty well behaved until Cousin Danny decided to crowdsurf at the bar with all the cousins. The bouncer quickly yelled at Boyfriend Matt (least likely to cause a problem) and the bartender secretly told us that it was pretty impressive that we were able to have him crowd surf for so long. This was at 1:45 and when we all decided Primanti's would be a good idea. It was. And the half I saved for breakfast the next morning was also a great idea!

The big Christmas event for my Mom's side of the family is Christmas Eve. Christmas Eve has always been the favorite holiday of all, until recently. The olds just complicate everything with there whacko planning. I'm not sure if it has always been this way or only recently, but let's be serious: there is no need for my dinner plate to have lasagna, pork roast, roast beef sandwich and stuffed pepper soup on it. Not because that is a lot of food (I had small portions, anyway) but because that DOES NOT GO and requires a LOT of effort. Also, my Aunt Ro's house has a very small basement and she basically shoves us all down there. She doens't actually shove us there, but that is where the food and drinks and chairs are so we don't have much choice to go anywhere else. My aunt also moved the very appropriately placed in a corner day bed and put it in the MIDDLE of the room. I think the idea was "look, now 6 people can sit on the bed instead of 3!" but it was still a TWIN BED in the MIDDLE of the room. It also gave the kids an opportunity to throw themselves on the bed and bounce other people while they were eating, drinking, chatting. It was weird. Also, we do the grabbag. Last year you remember (right?) that I painstakingly folded 25 $1 bills into a christmas wreath as a gift. This year, I was insipred by Parks and Recreation and made a Female TREATCHOSELF! gift that included: Diamonds (fake), Chocolate (covered pretzels) and Champagne (Korbel). My aunt ended up with this present and loved the sparkly bracelet, gave cousin Kelly the champagne and I snatched back those chocolate covered pretzels (yum!). I ended up with some knives - which I was pleased about.

My immediate family opens gifts on Christmas Eve. So after the events of Aunt Rosemary's Christmas Eve we all trecked back to my house (one street away) and searched for wine and after dinner liqour, clicked on the HDTV Yule Log and carols and began to open presents! This year we totally blew my mom's socks off and got her 8 of the wine glasses she loves and would never have got for herself. We wrapped them differently and gave them to her at separate times so she was really surprised - we did a good job! I always complain that I don't have any surprises for Christmas because I'm usually my mother's elf: shopping, wrapping, etc, but this year I did have surprises and got a lovely tortosie Coach boyfriend watch and my sister surprised me with this fake fur I've been adminiring at Macy's. Brother Adam got me all kinds of Steelers gear and Brother Matt asked me to buy myself something so he got me the boots that snagged the hoe I'm wearing today. Dad capped off Christmas by presenting me and Allie with savings bonds that were purchased in our name at birth and are just about done earning interest - woohoo!

The holiday was a total success and I had a great time being home! Although, I'm glad to be back in Dallas and attempting to reestablish some type of routine! The rest of 2011 will be spent on chores and mini projects and reading. Oh, and then I guess I'll also ring in the New Year with some lovely friends!

2011, you were The Times. 2012, the bar's been set high!

the unthinkable...

I'm getting ready to leave Dallas!

Do you feel like all I do is blame my lack of updating on travel plans?? Because I do! Lot's of back and forth this fourth quarter, and if things go my way... a trip to visit girlfriend Sarah for MLK weekend, a business trip back to Chattanooga at the end of January and perhaps another girls trip with Ashley and Kim to California in February or March will lead me right into all the bridal goodness to celebrate bride-to-be Allison in Philadelphia will take me pretty much through June! But, that's ok... because that's the only way I'd have it.  Now that I have the iPhone with much improved touch screen capabilities for enhanced texting, perhaps I'll figure out how to work the blogger app. Perhaps.

So, when we lasted chatted I told you I was online dating. This is true. I was winking and messaging with the best of them. And I even set up 3 dates with humans who passed the initial scan. I actually had to stop going on match.com becuase the amount of emails and winks is totally overwhelming. For the most part, there is a LOT of weeding out to do ... for every ten winks/messages recieved, I'd say there is only one worth responding to. And then, that person will soon enough prove themselves to be boring or something like that.

The problem with all of this activity is that I really enjoy my non activity time. My work day is fairly stressful with the new job and managing 20 people and having no idea what they do and they escalate everything and....

it's just a lot of anxiety.

So, to come home and watch some type of reality tv, enjoy my dinner, putz on gchat or read a book... well. I really love doing that. Especially after a vacation. And these dates were just cramping my style. So I decided to do the three and not go back online until January.

First date was with Wade who appeared much younger in person than in photos - but I could still see the resemblance so I wasn't so mad about that. He was very dull. I mean, don't get me wrong, I had no problem stirring up conversation but he was just... blah. OH! And, he admitted that one of his favorite movies is How to Lose a Girl in 10 Days. Now one of my dating questions is: So, what kind of movies do you like? I'm not a movie buff or anything, but pretty sure that is a weird movie for a 32 year old man to mention as a favorite during a first date.

Second date was with Patrick who appeared just as expected and was early (but, I was also late). He was funny and friendly and alluded to second date, but I was pleased when no text message game and didn't have to think of an excuse. I think both of us decided it was more friendly than romantic. He would be a good friend though because our conversation ended with discussing duck suicides at Niagra falls - I think that means he gets it.

Third date was with Justin who is 6'4 and was a few minutes late to the bar. But, we had great chat chat chatting for almost 4 hours. He even walked me all the way to my car, which was in the total opposite direction of his car. Texting occured and we went on a second date on Friday.

Pause.

I do not second date. I think there is something wrong with me, but I just don't do it. Why? Any number of reasons: he was short, he was weird, he liked the movie How to Lose a Guy in 10 Days, he blinks a lot, he wore cargo shorts, etc. However, there was no major red flag with Justin so second date occurred.

Play.

He was a perfect gentleman, opening doors picked up the check and offered me his arm to hold while walking. More great chat chat chatting and we visited three establishments. At the final stop of the night, we did the unthinkable. And because I know it is unacceptable, I'm going to put it out there and take the ridicule:

We sat on the same side of the booth/table.

I know, I know, I knowwwww. That is the WORST! Gag, barf - right!? But, I did sit on the same side as him and I feel like I need to admit to this totally out of character behavior and take appropriate actions to stop doing that. I mean, I knew this was bad, but I continue to be reminded after I admit the situation to multiple people and they all go: OH MY GOD. Are you kidddddddddding me!!??

Sigh. I did it. We have also chatted since then, and suspect a third date is likely after the holidays. I'm perfectly ok with this.

That takes us through Friday, and then on to Saturday, which was the girls celebration dinner! Emily and Jessica (Follower 82 and 83) are EXTREME planners and they, with the help of roommate Erin, planned a lovely reservation for 15 lovely ladies at St. Anne's. It was such a fun night! Now, I'm going to be modest and not tell you that we were the prettiest table in the whole damn restaurant or that we were definitely having the most fun in the restaurant or that you totally missed out on a phenom Christmas celebration, I'm just going to tell you the truth:

We were all dressed in our sparkles and holiday attire to celebrate Christmas and we drank a lot of wine. (Really, a lot). It was a really great holiday celebration and I'm very much looking forward to a New Years Eve celebration with some of these ladies!

Before we get to New Years, I'm off to Pittsburgh to celebrate Christmas! Things to look forward to: Rian's second visit to Pittsburgh, being Pete's date to his office party that he already told me is going to be terrible, the 3rd Annual Cousin's Night Out party, Miller Christmas, Pederson Christmas and hopefully, lots of shopping and baking!

So, before I get out of here, I need to set some follower business straight: I double counted cousin Ryan as follower 83. That is wrong. Follower 83 is Jessica (roommate of Follower 82, Emily) and was MOVED to follow after me asking her to do so in the last post. Jessica 2 is fabulous in the same fashion Emily is fabulous (they are "rooms") and Jess wins "prettiest" award from Saturday's dinner (she had GREAT hair)! I'm so happy Jessica is joining us as 83!

Pittsburgh Highlights

I am back in Dallas and it feels great! I'm not saying that to upset my Mother (which, if she's reading this, it probably will) but, it is so exhausting being away from your bed and your shower and your accessories and shoes! So, I'm back! In my bed, with my shampoo and my earrings and my pillows and it's just what I wanted.

So, you know I've been nonstop for ... 3??? weeks! I've been in Pittsburgh most of that time and then I had to go to our Boubonnais office which is south of Chicago. And then before that I was in Chattanooga and I think Phoenix. And... It's just been a very busy time of travel! But, thankfully, the only trip I have left this year is back to Pittsburgh for Christmas - and I can handle that.

So, Pittsburgh highlights:

1) The Flight. Success. Great book. Great tunes. 10pm arrival. All was right in the world! The book I was reading is called "All but for the" by Ali Smith and it's about a dinner guest's plus 1 that leaves the table and locks himself in a room in the house and communicates, occassionally, by sending a note under the door. It's very witty and made me chuckle, but I must confess, the end confused me. I would recommend it to a real reader and not a casual reader. I would not recommend purchasing it, just ask me and you can borrow it!

2) Thanksgiving. For whatever family reasons there are, we separated Thanksgiving this year between my Grandma and her sister's family. This is the first ever. Very disappointing because now that all of the cousins, for the most part, are drinking age and have been on their own a little bit.. the kid table is so fun! This year we missed cousin Patrick, who is definitely the wildcard. Either way, we had a great kids table dinner and Nanny made me a special chocolate pie for dessert since I hate all other Thanksgiving desserts. Imean, dessert is not dessert unless there is chocolate. So all those pies? YOU CAN SHOVE THEM UP YOUR BUTT!

3) The Office. Last year, you may recall, my family had two popular holiday sayings: HEY YOU, WOODCHUCK, QUIT CHUCKING MY WOOD! and CHRISTMAS IS RUINED. This year it is "AND SHOVE IT UP YOUR BUTT" to quote our favorite office character, Stanley. Well, ok, Stanley is not our favorite, Dwight is, but... we aren't quoting Dwight, are we? No dinner is complete without a long story and a suggestion for a better way to do something that ends with screaming out AND SHOVE IT UP YOUR BUTT. It's similar to tourettes, but on purpose, so actually, it is totally different.

4) The Grandparents, aka "the olds".  The olds moved in with my parents and I suppose some type of routine is being discovered in the house. I would say the highlights of the routine are: Wake up. Grandma doesn't feel well and Poppy needs breakfast. Take Grandma's blood pressure with the blood pressure tool in the living room. The blood pressure tool is actually a very fun exercise for the entire family and has been made into a game: who has the best blood pressure? Answer: Not my dad. Lots of watching TV. Ellen, The Stew, Bold and the Beautiful. If it's on ABC, they're watching it. Unless they press the wrong button on the remote, which they do (often) and then someone has to fix the color/channel/volume/power/caption/laungage/etc. Lunch. My grandma doesn't eat a lot so we push Ensure on her and my poppy says he doesn't want lunch but always eats cheese crackers or apple slices. The rest of the day is more TV. Sometimes my poppy takes a "walk" which is either circling the center of the house three times or walking down the driveway and back up to the house. He uses a cane, but "use" isn't the right word since all he does is drag it behind him. More TV. More on/off TV troubleshooting. Dinner. Grandma never wants anything for dinner but we have to make her eat something which she usually makes faces about and makes the entire process exhausting. Poppy is a good eater and cleans his plate. Grandma does not like AND SHOVE IT UP YOUR BUTT said at the dinner table, she shakes her head. Poppy laughs. He gets it. He's funny. After dinner is ice cream time. The olds LOVE ice cream. It is the only thing my grandma eats without complaining. And if grandma gets it, poppy gets it too. And since I'm scooping the ice cream... well.. ok, I'll just have a scoop or two also. The other fun part of the day is answer the same questions for my grandma. The big question is "What do you want for Christmas?" and I say "Diamonds. Big ones. 3 karats for my ears." This leads into a discussion about if I deserve them (apparently not) and that she might get herself some diamonds (not going to happen because she lost the last diamonds). And then there is a pause and she says "What do you want for Christmas?" And the second time she asks I'll usually say "I want $10 more than you are giving to Matt". And then the next time she says "What do you want for Christmas?" I say "Diamonds". And that goes on ALL. DAY. LONG. It's Groundhog Hour. And I'mnot getting any diamonds.

5) The Times. The Times were had a few nights. I went to a 90s Party with Peter and it was really so funny because, in addition to 90's attire like starter jackets, they had put beanie babies EVERYWHERE, huggies, kool-aid squeezers and gushers. Top notch. I do love seeing Peter when I'm in Pittsburgh but hate when he doesn't shave his face. Which he didn't. Which I suggested he should. Which he didn't. I went out with Sister Allie and Brother Matt on Wednesday and SOME STRANGER TUGGED MY HAIR AND SAID "Is this natural?" To which I said "It's natural, and it's amazing." To which he said "Don't get a big head" To which I SHOULD have said "Don't get a big nose... oh... wait.." but I actually said "It's not ego, it's a fact" and then that was that. He had a giant nose, really. And then On Friday I went out with my Dad and Brother Matt and Cousin Patrick to the Southside and saw MK, fiance Tom, Kolan and Gio. Within 30 minutes of getting there, Cousin Patrick, who had been drinking vodka since 2pm, was kicked out of the bar and we had to leave. But, we got primatis which, I consider a successful night.

6) Online Dating. I'm doing it, and I've had three dates. That will be my next update!