Seacrets!!!

I wore a terrible outfit to work on Thursday with a french braid in my hair. You cannot wear both a terrible outfit and a french braid at the same time because this makes me, you, anyone, all everyone's, look like a doofus. But, you know what, I didn't care because I am SO TAN!

Why am I SO TAN? Because I was tanning on vacation. I spent my vacation with a lot of people who are very concerned with how I will recap all adventures. Everyone wants their moment to shine and I think it's been decided that the best way to tell you what the hell has been going on with me is to break my vacation into three blogs.

Vacation Part 1: Seacrets

I pretty much stopped refering to Ocean City, MD as OCMD and refered to it only as Seacrets. Seacrets, for those of you poor souls that do not know, is Jamica USA in OCMD. I was so excited to go there to turn 25 with the most fabulous group of ladies. I mean really - I couldn't have built a better all star team! We had Michelle, Gio, Leigh, Kim, Allison, Ashley, LH, Natalie and Anne. Quite an attractive group, if you ask me!

The Thursday night I arrived LH and Natalie picked me up from the airport and showed me a surprise they had in the back seat: Cat Wine. It was not called "Cat Wine" but it had a picture of a feline on the front and that is the only reason LH and Natalie purchased the wine. See, both LH and Natalie have very careful plans to never get married, move in together, become spinsters and name a plethora of cats after all of their past loves. I'll tell you what, if I was aware of how serious they were when I wrote blog posting "TNCLFM", see the future you want not the future you'll get would be capstone issue of TNCLFM. (Wow, I'm full of such great knowledge).

Anyway, we return to find "hot snacks" setup by Lin (LH's roommate) of a tasty taquito and salsa and chips! We chatted and gossiped and Natalie and I planned LH's future marriage and made sure to get Lin and Kenny onboard. LH did not appreciate this because she thinks Lin loves all boys LH dates and we might scare away the future husband, but I think this is false and hope that Lin continues to encourage said potential future marriage.

There was also a point in time where Kenny told me I had big hands (WHICH I DON'T) and I'm not going to talk about it because he made fun of me a lot and you know how I'm really sensitive. Just thinking about it there are teardrops on my keyboard (sung to the tune of Taylor Swift's Teardrops on my Guitar). Kenny also brought out a big Halloween costume hand and made me wear it to drink my beverage. Rude, Kenny. RUDE!

Friday morning we woke up bright and early and called Michelle and Leigh at 9AM to tell them we were an hour away. They said great! We are 90 minutes away! And then we hung up and contiued to putz around the house and not leave until.... 10:30AM. We had to go pick up Anne and Gio and meet Ash and Kim and then LH has serious anxiety about parallel parking so we didn't really arrive at destination until... 11ish. This is when Michelle and Leigh call to tell us they are there, but we have to confess we have not yet left Philadelphia. I assume those two went to the beach and then we made Car Philadelphia (Natalie, LH, Anne and Gio) and Car Work (Me, Kim, and Ashley). CW was following CP until ring leader LH ran through a red light and then Ashley said go right when she meant go left and then next thing you know CW is in Center City Philadelphia and at least 25 minutes behind. Since we were behind we took a pit stop to a great wine store that was so very crowded for a Friday afternoon when people should be working. I can only assume this means there are many alcoholics in Delaware. What a terrible state. But what a great store.

CW also decided that while we were behind we would get some Taco Bell. That made the car ride great, but the Diet Pepsi made the car ride bad.

Just a shot or two. And,
bananas for hangover
 potassium.

Arrival at Seacrets home: Astoria 301 was lovely! The house we beautiful and perfect for all of our needs! The only terrible piece was the minimal amount of linens provided. I don't know if you know me or not, but I'm a tall human with a lot of hair. I cannot shower with ONE towel. That is ridiculous. I need a body towel and a hair towel. I was very upset at this and Leigh so kindly called Brad (owner of Astoria) and additional linens were brought over - THANK GOD I GOT TO HAVE A TWO TOWEL SHOWER!  After linen counting, we spent a great afternoon on the beach chatting and laughing and just being such a great beach group! We ordered pizza for dinner and went to take a nap but really turned into me and LH being weird and wanting to fill the tub with hot water and drink beer. Natalie joined the party and then the Bose joined the party and the next thing you know were giggling and singing in the jacuzzi tub and avoiding napping like the plague.

I was so excited to ring out 24 and ring in 25 at midnight, we (me) might have been too excited about the tequila shots. That's ok though - it was my birthday. Gio brought these great cups called "Sliz" and it's a martini glass shaped with a straw and it makes the chaser go with the shot. Natalie and I got to have the first ones since it was our birthday weekend! I have no idea where we went that night, but we had to take a bus there. The entire bus sang happy birthday to me and I was so happy! There was a small child on the bus though and apparently I thought this was irresponsible of the Mother. I mean - it was after midnight. Mother and Mother's Sister did not agree with me. I don't know that I made it out much longer than 1:30 until I begged someone to take me home. Ashley was so good and kind to me and we hailed a cab home. I decided to eat most of the crust off of the remaining pizza and happily went to bed in the birthday girl suite.

Waking up 25 was just perfect! All the girls were there and we all wake up and are chatting and giggling on the bed - just the same as in college. I am so proud to not have a hangover and we are SO excited for Seacrets. During the morning getting ready party, I realized that I was not able to locate my toothbrush the night before so I decided a morning look would be the best bet. The toothbrush does not show up. I have to again do a finger toothbrush because no one can drive and no drugstores are near us. This is me being very classy as a 25 year old.

Seacrets is just what I remembered it being and I was SO excited. We
made friends with our waitress and Mom and Dad party at the table over. LH and Natalie went out to find a raft for us and never came back so we knew that was good news. We took the purse bag containing smartphones and cameras out into the bay and placed them in the center of Natalie's raft. I said "How mad are we that we brought this bag and have to watch it now?" Meaning - uh so annoying that we have a bag. But what Natalie heard is "IF YOU GET THIS BAG WET YOU WILL RUIN ALL THE SMARTPHONES AND EVERYONE'S LIFE!!!!" This is not what I said or meant, but apparently after I split from raft 1 to raft 2, Natalie started drunk crying over the possible ruination of smartphones. It was a really funny drunk cry once we figured out what was wrong with her - but - for the rest of the weekend we didn't dare use the word "smartphone" around her again... after we learned a second and third time that just the word "smartphone" started new drunk tears. Anyway, Raft 2 was THE TIMES! We made some new friends and just floated and laughed and cheers-ed and continually re-applied SPF and it was WONDERFUL! The group some how got separated and sorted and the next thing I know, all I can find is Anne, Gio and Kim. Kim and I decide to leave, but can't find the rest of the party that had the bag with smartphones and shoes. Kim and I were maybe intoxicated so we decide to go home and eat. This means leaving the bay. Leaving the bar. And walking 3 blocks home. In only bikinis. No identification. No shoes. No coverups. Just walking down the street it beach acceptable clothes but not street acceptable clothes. So much giggling occurred! No accidental stepping on rocks either which was a plus!

By the time we get home I find my only remaining credit card not in the smartphone bag and we put on shoes and tshirts and go to Belly Busters where I ate an entire meatball hoagie and have never been happier in my entire life! Natalie appears, alone, and I don't know if we ever found out where she was, but we were happy to have a 3-way dinner. 3-way dinner turns into 10-way napping and resting in the condo and the final decision that no, we cannot make it back to Seacrets for the night time party. I'm ok with this and a handful of us get in the king bed and watch How to Lose a Guy in 10 Days and it was a beautiful birthday night!!

Sunday Funday at the beach came and went too soon! We had a great day and then Kim, Ashley and I had to leave to go to a work conference. Even though we were sad to be leaving the group early, all was right in the world once we stopped to get Dairy Queen on the drive back to Philadelphia!

My friends are truly amazing.