I still hate bugs

I don't know if my heart is in this post... so we'll see how it goes. It should go great since (not bragging or anything) I'd consider the funeral post a mild success. I wanted to actually start this blog with some funny play on words about death, but I couldn't think of anything. I then googled it- and that didn't quite go as planned (there are some weird things out there). And then a lot of people suggested things about my funeral blog and I wanted to comment on them.... but half the time I'm not listening to you people so I don't remember everything that was said to me.

Things I do remember:
1) I'm not playing On Eagle's Wings at my funeral. I don't care if it will get me "maximum tears" - I'm just not into it and I'm not playing it.
2) When I have new guests at my home in Munhall, I have introduced them to Tucker and Lacey. Silence is mandatory until you make the sign of the cross.... then you are expected to say a few words in memory of the lost dogs. All while Moses sits at your feet thinking Tucker and Lacey are some treat or chew toy you're going to give him. Sidenote- I was curious if Moses would actually EAT Tucker's ashes so, Mom, close your eyes, I did maybe lower the ashes to Moses once and he might have tried to take them from my hands. So, yes, Moses would actually try to EAT Tucker. I don't do that anymore though- it's out of my system.

Welcome new follower (actually old follower but now she's public): LFS or Leigh as some as you know her. I don't know when the friends and I got into initials- but I dig it. Leigh makes the very short list of grown up friends I have that live alone. If you haven't lived alone yet, or aren't sure if you'll like it- DO IT. My ideal situation is obviously to get a husband. But- if I could get a husband that had his own house? Glorious.

Other things going on in my life right now: Work. It comes in waves and this wave has given me the chance to work with MS Visio. Have you ever used it?? I'm IN LOVE. I mean, Excel will always be my first love (and a spreadsheet will probably be the only baby I ever have) but Visio is super cool so I've just been playing with that at work. I had to get into the Visio because my ultimate work time chatters (Kim and Ashley) were out of the office. Which is terrible. I hate when they vacation at the same time and I don't have anyone to discuss monumental work moments with. But... I have my ways. Last Friday was the WORST though. There were bugs in the bathroom.

From: Miller, Megan L
Sent: Friday, July 09, 2010 9:57 AM
To: Netz, Ashley M; Leidy, Kimberly R
Subject: BUG

HUGE BUG IN THE BATHROOM!

OMG. My heart is pounding. I was in the bathroom and I was buttoning my jeans (woohoo Friday) and I turned around to flush the toilet and out of the corner of my eye I see something black move and I think (mid flush) "was that a bug?" CONFIRMED! I had to muffle my scream since I am at work- It was like a horror movie- I could not get the stall door open fast enough and I'm internally freaking but externally quietly running away like a mad woman! SO. SCARY. HEART. POUNDING. I washed my hands (of course) very fast and the entire time I was prancing up and down sp afraid the bug would sneak up on me. I don't know what I would have done if someone came in.

Actually. I probably would have said "BUG!" and left in a hurry.

It was like a grasshopper but not as long and all black. AND RED EYES. And it was so scary and gross.

That was SO SCARY. It took me at least two more hours to calm down.... and then....

From: Miller, Megan L
Sent: Friday, July 09, 2010 12:57 PM
To: Netz, Ashley M ; Leidy, Kimberly R
Subject: RE: BUG

I swear to God- there are two of them in there!!!!

I went back to the bathroom and I was looking around the stall before I sat down because I had to be safe and I SAW ONE! So I left the stall (pants unbuttoned) and started creeping in the other stalls- I wanted to be far enough away but also make sure there wasn't another one- BUT THERE WAS.

So I had to take a middle stall and I was inspecting that one and all of a sudden the BR is the place to be - so I'm looking in the stall (pants still unbuttoned), pushing doors open and looking on the ground and I was forced to take a stall so as not to further embarrass myself. WELL. ONE OF THE BUGS WAS LOOKING AT ME FROM THE OTHER STALL.

It was all I could do not to scream. I QUICKLY washed my hands and ran out of the bathroom. I'm still jumpy sitting at my desk. No more bathroom for me today- I'd sooner go home then go back in there!!! THE BR OF BUGS!!! Omg I wish you could have seen them. They were mini grasshoppers or GIANT FLIES! Red eyes. I swear it.

I hate bugs. All kinds of bugs. And when I am most VULNERABLE WITH MY PANTS DOWN THEY ARE GOING TO FIND ME???!!!!!!! It's terrible. You would think that they would share some sympathy with me when they got back in the office, true? False.

From: Netz, Ashley M
Sent: Monday, July 12, 2010 9:17 AM
To: Miller, Megan L; Leidy, Kimberly R
Subject: RE: BUG

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAH!!!! OMG!! I am cracking up!!

Is this what the bug looked like???



No sympathy. Disgusting, Ashley. But that is exactly what I found in the bathroom.

Is anyone excited about the addition of pictures to my blog???? I HAD to. She uploaded a VIDEO to her blog. I mean- I can't compete with that. If you haven't been reading Hebner's blog: she's been cursed by a lizard and she doesn't have a kitchen. Oh, and she's video blogging. Kids these days and their gadgets...

One final bit of work news: I joined the Safety Committee. Yes I joined this solely because of Dwight Scrhute (no he isn't on my committee). I have even become the Chairperson of the committee which means I get to present notes prepared by someone else during other meetings with facilities people. I. Cannot. Wait. There was no formal agenda to today's initial meeting, but it went something like this:

1) Small talk (Aida does not have pink eye, but she did have eye surgery on Friday. Leon said Friday is the worst day to have surgery. Aida believes that because her doctor did not give her an RX and it feels like there were 4 eye lashes in her eye poking her. Tim can't imagine 4 eyelashes in his eye because just one and he stops working. Joann didn't want to sidetrack the group but she HAD to tell this story: She was really fatigued and started losing her balance. So she went to the doctor and thought she had an ear infection. When the doctor looked in her ear, do you know what he found?? AN EYELASH!!! AN EYELASH GAVE HER ALL THOSE PROBLEMS!!! And, oh my gosh, as soon as he got that eyelash out- well, she was all better! Then the entire group was totally amazed that JUST an eyelash could cause this problem!!)
2) Assignments (I became the chairperson but apparently I don't even have to take notes or send the emails. I just have to be listed as "Do you have questions? Email Megan Miller!")
3) Current Safety Hazards (You are not allowed small heaters at your desk. But you are allowed fans and radios. During a mass evacuation it is suggested that women remove their high heels to prevent falling down the steps. The flagstone is very pretty on the walk way but causes some people tripping issues when coming into work. Sometimes there are spills in the stairway by the cafeteria. These items will be monitored closely.)
4) Next steps (Check your floor. Meet again in August.)

I'll tell you- it's worth working in a field office for the small talk- if you're in the right mood. Although, Plano isn't as great for the reality TV small talk as Chattanooga was. OH AND- COME ON- The Bachelorette last night? SNORE FEST. I've read every spoiler I can get my hands on, I know what happens, the (epi)sodes are so boring... and still, I continue to watch - live. Inbelievable. When will I learn?